Compassion is going outside your own concerns to make someone else's a priority. This is quite difficult to do as it goes against our natural survival instinct. Thank goodness some people can rise to this level.
Compassion is love in action
If your friend is having a bad day or is stressed out, you take their children out and you cook for the family.
You help an older person cross a road or you give up your seat for them.
It’s about experiencing the feeling of pain someone goes through. That feeling is translated into action because you want to do something about it.
It’s the ability to put someone’s needs forward before our own.
It is a lifestyle you adopt.
It’s usually not something you’re born with.
It’s the strength to stand out for others and be there for others.
It’s the base of Islam.
If you are Muslim, you have probably chosen this lifestyle.
It applies to people and it applies to the planet.
It is refusing to be part of the backstabbing team too.
Compassion is expressed in action.
Compassion can also be expressed in words.
Compassion ultimately can be applied in silence.
Being silent when someone judges others or backstab someone else is a way to show your disapproval.
It is a way to stop any further backstabbing.
It is a way to show people that you disapprove without being confrontational.
Sometimes we hear people close to us making comments about fat people, about a nationality, about people using too much make up or about bad habits someone has.
If you have true compassion for the people who cannot defend themselves, then you have to stop them from back stabbing by being silent.
Responding only causes people to justify themselves.
It increases the stabbing.
Most of the things you take for granted is actually not what you think.
People are not black and white. There are infinite shades of grey.
So here are 5 more compassionate behaviors you can try.
- Be silent. Respond to criticisms with silence.
- Do not take part in any backstabbing.
- Leave the room where people are criticizing others.
- Do not take anyone’s side, even your best friend. You are only going to hear part of the truth anyway. Everyone will make themselves look good. Tell your best friend that you are here to support him or her, but not to encourage hate.
- Do not backbite. If you disagree with someone or dislike their behavior, tell them. Get it out in the open. If you can’t talk about it or get it out there, get over it. Do not even think it. No one is perfect and you probably do not know the whole story.
Easier said than done, for sure.
It starts with education. Asking kids to tell their friends what frustrates them goes a long way to solve problems quickly, to end a bad feeling from developing, and to prevent a lot of future frustration for everyone.
Preventing children from venting their frustrations over a misunderstanding is a sure way to prevent the wrong kind of feelings to develop. They can call their friends on the phone and sort it out if they have to.
Do not take side.
They need to learn to express themselves.
They also learn to face people with the truth.
And they learn diplomacy.
Compassion starts in your head and in your heart.
You cannot be truly compassionate if you are not convinced this is an essential part of your life and it starts by the way you look at things.